Ways to Annoy People

from: Stradmore Notes
Bold sentences are the ones that have check in the Stradmore Notebook. ;)

• Organize a bunch of people in one class to emit a low humming noise, keeping straight faces.
• Superglue coins to the floor, count how many people try to pick them up.
• End the paper with "This paper will self-destruct in 10 seconds".
• TTyyppee eevveerryy lleetteerr ttwwiiccee.
• When writing an especially long paper, put a recipe for chocolate cake in the middle and see if the professor notices.
• Ask to introduce your "invisible friend" in the empty seat behind you, & ask for one extra copy of each handout.
• Spend the lecture blowing Kisses to other students.
• Wear a cape with a big "S" on it. Inform classmates that the "S" stands for "stud".
• At the end of class, shake everyone's hand and say, "It was nice seeing you at class today".
• While taking notes, repeat whatever the teacher says as you write it down.
• Make eye contact with each classmate.
• Learn Morse code, and have conversations with friends in public consisting entirely of "Beeeeep Bip Bip Beeep Bip".
• Speak only in a "robot" voice.
• Leave your turn signal on for fifty miles.
• Reply to everything someone says with "that's what YOU think".
• Forget the punchline to a long joke, but assure the listener it was a "real hoot".
• Insert nonsense computer jargon in conversations, and see if people play along to avoid the appearance of ignorance.
• Holler random numbers while someone is counting.
• Adjust the tint on your TV so that all the people are green, and insist to others that you "like it that way".
• Drum on every available surface.
• Set alarms for random times.
• Honk and wave to strangers.
• ONLY TYPE IN UPPERCASE.
• Pay for your dinner with coins.
• Repeat everything someone says as a question.
• Write "X - BURIED TREASURE" in random spots on all of someone's roadmap.
• Lie obviously about trivial things such as the time of day.
• Ask the waitress for an extra seat for your "imaginary friend".
• Make appointments for the 31st of September.
• Pay tolls with $1000 bills.
• Before exiting the elevator, push all the buttons.
• Knock and ask "How is it going?" to someone constipated in a public bathroom stall.
• Chew other people's pencils.
• Shake with your left hand.
• Repeat the following conversation a dozen times: "Do you hear that?", "What?", "Never mind, it's gone now".
• Push all the flat Lego pieces together tightly.
• When in a conversation, look out the window, then say "Wait, start over. I wasn't paying attention".
• When talking to someone, look at a spot about two inches to their right.
• Speak so quietly that people always have to get you to repeat it.
• Take photos of people walking down the street and then run away.
• When IM-ing, spell everything incorrectly.
• Move people's bookmarks ahead three pages when they aren't looking.
• Stand on a busy corner. Gasp, look and point up. See how many people look.
• Click your mechanical pencils or your pens during a test in school.
• While going down in an elevator, scream "AAAAAGGGGGHHHHH!!!!! WE'RE GONNA DIE!!!" for no apparent reason.
• Clear your throat every three or four words while speaking.
• When driving with companions in the car, every few seconds slam on the brakes and insist that a squirrel ran in front of you.
• Whenever anybody says anything to you. Respond by saying, "I know".
• Put the wrong date and year on the papers you hand in to your teachers.
• When talking to someone, tilt your head to the side.

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